You are not your effing Khakis!

    As someone who has collected a string of odd and different jobs, it has always been my stance that a person is not just the job that they perform. Experience has born this out for me over the course of my short and eventful life. Take my friend, we'll call her Molly, Molly is in her late fifties and is enjoying her third career as a gardener working for a large landscaping company near Asheville. She lives with her partner in Asheville, enjoys going to opera, loves the local art scene, and generally milks life in Asheville for all it's worth. However, the fact remains that in the reductive mindset of our times Molly is "just" a gardener.

    In my current life as a PCV I run across this dilemma in another sense. Many of the Moroccans I work with do not socialize with me outside of our interactions in the work setting. My interactions with PCVs tend to fall to the other extreme. I interact socially with PCVs much more than I do actual work with them, and when we do work it is often used as an excuse to create a social event.

    This dichotomy leads to a rather unfair double standard around the value many PCVs, including myself, place on relationships between Moroccans and PCVs and PCVs and PCVs. For example, if my counterpart is a nice guy who sucks at his job I will most likely think poorly of him because I don't interact with him in the social milieu in which he shines. The same holds true for basically any Moroccan in my life with the exception of my host family and friends in my site. It certainly is the tendency almost universally in my working life.

    On the other hand the standard by which I judge PCVs is much more lenient when it comes to their professional performance. These people are usually my friends first, and therefore if someone's personality rubs me the wrong way then it doesn't matter how good they are at their job I won't like them. On the other hand there are volunteers who probably aren't as effective as they could be and might even be outright hostile to Moroccans occasionally, but because I mesh with their personalities I find myself defending them when I shouldn't.

    The fact is that good people are good people, but doing what you say you're going to do is part of that. If you take a job and don't try to at least be competent at that job it indicates a failing on your part. Some personality defects affect other people more than others, but when you go back on your word you always hurt someone. Unfortunately I struggle with seeing the whole picture around both Moroccans and PCVs, and PCVs tend to get the better end of that deal. We aren't our jobs, but they are part of us.

    That is of course with the possible exception of myself. I'm afraid that I will forever be "Peace Corps Jack" to a small group of Fullbright scholars in Rabat. Thanks for putting me up guys, I appreciate the hospitality. Be good and DO WORK!

What’s the difference really?

    Last night I hosted a young lady who has been in Morocco for the past year working on a fullbright scholarship. She only has a little bit of time left and is reflecting on a lot of things that I will have to think about soon. What was the most valuable part of her project? Was her time here well spent? What is she going to do when she gets back to the US?

    I have heard a lot of Peace Corps Volunteers musing on these subjects as they approach their Close of Service dates. It makes me wonder whether we are not more similar to each other than it seems at first blush. On the one hand Fullbrighters are here to do research, and not necessarily provide technical assistance as such. However, they are put in situations that often demand that they lend a helping hand.

    We are told that we are supposed to be ambassadors for the United States from the first day we are in country to the second we leave. Fullbrighters are just told to do good research. Yet we are often placed in sites wherein American Culture is so out of the normative experience that it is difficult to find a common nomenclature, much less actually convey our value system effectively. Fullbrighters on the other hand mostly live in large cities whose populace is much more exposed to western media through advertising, magazines, and television. They actually have a good starting point for a common understanding, and based on our conversation last night they often are able to articulate our culture very effectively. Then again, a lot of what they study, we live. A lot of the people they interview we eat dinner with on a regular basis. They research and we experience.

    The fact of the matter is that Fullbrighters often talk a lot of trash about Peace Corps kids and vice versa. We, the Peace Corps, dominate this country's experience of Americans, even more so than tourists in many cases. There are over 200 of us and the Fullbright program only has 15 kids in country. They have a much harder time explaining what they do, because most people assume that they must be Peace Corps Volunteers or something just like it. It's easy to see how they could resent us. Then again, they get paid four times the amount that we do. They get to live in large modern cities with most of the amenities of home and a much smaller culture gap. It's easy to see how we could resent that too.

    Be that as it may, after hosting a Fullbrighter for dinner, after hanging out and watching the office, and after reminiscing about home I have to say that we have much more in common than not. I miss the same things that she does. We shared many of the same experiences, and struggled with many of the same things. We both feel a call to help those without the opportunities that we grew up with in America and we both feel changed in a fundamental way by our experiences here. We both love living abroad and we love being with the people to whom we have become very close. We are strangers in a strange land that is getting more familiar every day. We are united in so many things that the differences seem to pale in comparison. This post goes out to Steph. Thanks for the Apple pie, the laughs and the perspective. I have talked smack about Fullbrighters for the last time, and I wish you all the luck in America, life and love. See you soon Nsha'allah. ;-p

Long time no post…

Well, oh faithful readers, it's been a little while since my last post. A lot has happened, I have lost my bank card, got stranded for a while in someone else's site. I am organizing a workshop for a bunch of associations. I joined a fantasy football league. I identified an exciting lo-tech super green solution for a problem my community has with heating. I secured a commitment from the department of water and forests to help my community start an experimental fuel wood grove. A lot has happened.

    On the other hand, a lot has stayed the same. I am still hanging out in the same site with the same people, and having the same conversations. It's something that I hear from a lot of other volunteers aside from myself. "Why do we always have the same conversations?" The people in my site seem to like me, but the fact is that there is only so much we have in common. People here remind me of people in small town America in certain respects. They're content, settled, and largely unconcerned with life outside of this town. This is not to say that they don't have problems sometimes, that they don't go anywhere ever, or that they are apathetic. However, there is a certain investment in place that just doesn't register with most PCVs.

    What I mean by all this is that there are certain people who are willing to leave everything they know and love behind to do something they think will be incredible. There are certain people who will not do that, and very often think the former type is a little bit nuts. Oddly enough, joining the Peace Corps is one way that the former personality type is almost guaranteed to run into the latter. As a matter of fact, most health and environment volunteers are dropped right smack into the middle of tiny villages full of them.

    We, the adventurous "leave it all behind" type love to talk about the places we have been, the places we want to go, and adventures we want to have. Basically we're unapologetic dreamers and we talk like it. The people that we live with discuss things like who is talking/feuding with whom, the price their crops will fetch, the weather, and the price of transport. These are all valuable conversations to have if one lives in a small farming town to be sure, but after a while it becomes a little repetitive. You add to that a sizeable cultural and linguistic divide and things can get a little weird.

    That said, there are definitely moments that bring us all together. I experienced this for the first time yesterday. My fellow environment volunteers and I have spent the last three weeks organizing a workshop for local associations to educate them about some of the principals behind successful projects. We discussed things like group dynamics, community involvement, and monitoring/evaluation techniques. It was really rewarding to be able to involve our local associations in a dialogue not only with ourselves, but with each other. Just when I thought we had nothing in common I find that we are all looking to do the same thing, and that we can find common ground.

    Now, finally, I have a direct concrete answer for why I'm here. I'm here because it's possible for people who don't completely understand each other to work together. I'm here because we can do good, and we can find understanding. I'm here because I believe, as do all volunteers, that we have more in common than not. It's nice to finally have all this affirmed by completing a successful project; no matter how small.

This is why we can’t have nice things…

    I recently arrived back at site from a two week technical training in a city about four hours travel away from me. It was the first time my entire group had been able to spend more than a few days together in the same location. It was time for the grand social experiment to begin. The question we endeavored to answer is, what happens to young Americans when you separate them from everything that is familiar to them for three months and then bring them all back together in a place where they have access to the two staples of life in America, pizza and beer?

    The answer it turns out is rather surprising. The two sectors were housed separately in hotels across town from each other. The health group is almost all women and the environment group is almost all men. We were occupied for about 8 hours each day and then released into town until our curfew at 10:30pm. Given that dinner was at 8pm and there was a bar and a pizza parlor about halfway between the two hotels you can imagine that a lot of volunteers chose to abandon their respective hotels as soon and often as possible to do what we like to call "cross-sector exchange."

    For the most part we behaved ourselves, we used our free time to relax and talk shop. We exchanged horror stories about our sites and the various ridiculous experiences we have shared. We even talked about possible cross-sectoral projects that we could do if our sites happened to be close enough to each other to accommodate that sort of thing. However, almost all of this perfectly respectable socializing was done in the context of a steady consumption of beer and/or pizza.

    I suspect that the one thing I will never become accustomed to about this country is the reactionary way people respond to prohibitions. In our case, being denied time to socialize and drink during the last three months led to a glut of both when we were finally granted the opportunity. In some cases, to an excess, I won't mention any names (I never do) but there were a couple of people who used the opportunity to get completely hammered and/or start some drama. There were some heated words, a couple of people ended up crying, and some seriously awkward moments for folks in our stage.

    The worst thing that ended up happening happened towards the end of the week. Some of the folks in our group elected to break policy by drinking in the hotel that housed the event. Not only is this grounds for getting booted out of the Peace Corps if you get busted, it's highly disrespectful to our Muslim hosts, for whom drinking is completely forbidden. However, this is not to say that all Moroccans abstain, some do drink, but it's within a highly stigmatized social context. They look at drinking like we might look at using marijuana. At any rate, some of us drank in the hotel, and while they weren't caught, they left evidence of their debauchery to be found by hotel staff. Thusly did the hotel management and our program staff find out and suddenly everyone was in trouble.

    On the one hand I feel a little bit insulted that anyone would be so callous and stupid as to break the rules that flagrantly, but if I'm going to be completely honest, I must admit that I understand the impulse. We are adults, and are perfectly capable of handling ourselves as such. We are Americans who are living in a completely foreign and sometimes supremely frustrating culture. It would be nice to have a space that we can use to at least create the illusion of the familiar and comfortable. For some people this means being able to relax and drink with a few people in private. I don't condone what they did, but we are in a difficult situation working for people who sometimes seem ungrateful, and even hostile, despite the sacrifices we have made to come here. The folks who broke policy were dealing with this situation in the way that seemed most comfortable and familiar to them. I can understand that. Unfortunately for us, we can't afford that particular luxury. We are ambassadors for the US 24 hours a day. We are expected to be culturally sensitive ALL THE TIME, and that's why they pay us the big bucks.

Put on Your Traveling Shoes…

    Travel in the US is something that most people see as a minor inconvenience and occasionally a serious undertaking, but things are a little bit different here in Morocco. This weekend I will be travelling to a training session in a site north of mine so it seems appropriate to talk a little bit about travel. There are several different modes of travel available to PCVs in Morocco. There are trains, which are very limited in usefulness as they only run between a few of the largest cities. CTM buses are next up, these are government run tour buses that run at prescribed times along prescribed routes, they only stop at designated stops and are really nice. A step down from this are the souq buses, these run at prescribed times as well but are not as reliable because they'll stop for anyone with a thumb out as long as they have room for another passenger. After that you have the transit, which plays a large role in my life, these are converted Mercedes vans of various vintages and occasionally run according to a schedule but mostly just go when they are full. After that are the ever present taxis, these fit six, are occasionally terrifying (depending on the drive), and leave when they are full not a minute earlier. Some people hitch, but this is against Peace Corps policy and occasionally gets people in trouble when they ride with strangers. Most people who do hitch do so from site only and with people they recognize.

    The first thing to know about Moroccan travel is that things are rarely, if ever, on time. However they will occasionally be early and will not wait for you. Waiting, therefore, is a big part of getting around here. If I had a dollar for every hour I waited on transportation I could probably fly home for a bar-b-que sandwich right now. The other thing to remember is that things usually run in one direction in the morning and the other direction at night. It is important to keep this in mind when planning routes and travel times. Take, for example, the transit run from Imilchil to Beni Milal. This run leaves in the morning from Imilchil and will get you to Aghbala in under three hours. You switch transits there and it's just about two more hours to Beni. Seems easy right, it is, but only on the way to Beni from Imilchil. The return trip doesn't work quite that way, because the transit back to Imilchil leaves from Beni in the afternoon and gets to Aghbala in the early evening. The catch is that the transit that takes you the rest of the way leaves from Aghbala to Imilchil in the morning. Thusly you have to either spend the night in Aghbala and budget two days for the trip or take another route. As you can probably tell things get convoluted quickly.

    Another interesting wrinkle is that not all forms of transportation are available in all places. My site, for example has only transits. Thus, if you want to get out you have to plan on being ready at certain times. This is not negotiable, the transit will not wait, and it may not show up when you expect. Flexibility is key here. In some sites there is no set transportation schedule and "resident" transport. In these places you have to stand next to the road and wait for something to pass that has room in it. Very few people in these sites have cars; so hitching, if you are willing to risk it, usually isn't a reliable answer either.

The final, and worst, situation is the walk in site. In these sites there isn't even a road to stand next to. You have to hike out to the road to get to the point of waiting for something to pass. I met a young lady the other day that lives in a town eight kilometers from the nearest road. If her luck isn't running, and nothing passes, she walks sixteen K roundtrip for nothing and loses a day. There, but for the grace of god, go I.

On the other end of the spectrum are the sites in large cities. These sites almost always have active and available transportation. All of them have taxies that run throughout the city and to many other places. They usually have CTM stations, souq bus stations, transit stations, and a few have trains. You can literally get wherever you want to go at almost any hour of the day. Hopefully the city where I will be going for my training will have this kind of transportation. A decent Mexican restaurant wouldn't hurt either, but you can't have everything ;-P. Till next time ya'll, take it from me transportation is a luxury not a right. Enjoy yours while you have it, and think of those of us who don't occasionally. Peace.

What DO you do anyway?

    Recently I've fielded several questions about what I do in Morocco and what my responsibilities actually are. The answer to this question is a little bit more complicated than you might think at first blush, and I will try to explain this as clearly as possible. Peace Corps has three main goals; which are to provide technical assistance, to foster an understanding of American culture abroad, and foster an understanding of the cultures we operate in back home in the States. So, in reality I have three jobs in one.

    The first part of my job, technical assistance, covers one of the three projects I am working on right now. I have a grant proposal in the works to secure funding for the purchase of materials for the construction of five hundred meters of new irrigation canal in my main duwar (village). The idea is that by providing the start-up capital; the Peace Corps is providing an opportunity for many members of my community to learn and implement new skills so that next time they won't need us at all.

    The other two projects that I am working on are developing presentations for cultural events put on by Moroccans. These two events have different focuses, but satisfy the same Peace Corps requirement. That would be number two, communicating American culture abroad. The larger of the two festivals is a yearly event that gives volunteers in my province the opportunity to talk about stewardship, conservation, and adventure as we give the national park we live next a little bit of good publicity. The second festival is happening for the first time this year in my souq town. We had the first planning meeting for it a few days prior to this post, and it looks like our role will be to educate the public about pollution sources, recycling, and water conservation. These may not seem terribly "cultural" on the surface, but they convey to our audience something important about the United States. It says that our culture values forethought, thriftiness, innovation, and hard work. This message is not obvious on the surface but it is part of what I plan to speak about at these events.

    I am satisfying the last requirement of Peace Corps through several mediums. The first and most obvious means to that end is sitting right in front of your face. Through this blog I try, as often as I can, to send little snap shots of my life here back home to you. The other means of communication that I use is a program called Worldwise Schools. Through this program I will be sending letters and pictures back home to a class of elementary school students in the United States. I will try to give them an age appropriate version of what I try give you each week on this blog; a little taste of Morocco.

    The rest of my time is spent taking care of the mundane tasks that life requires of all of us, checking the mail, buying groceries, doing the laundry, and taking a little time for myself when I can. These things eat up a lot more of my time than I am used to, but that's part of the experience. Laundry, for example, takes an aggregate total of an hour, at most, in the states. I include putting it in the wash switching it over to the dryer and folding it. In Morocco it takes at least half a day, usually longer. I wash by hand which involves soaking, scrubbing and rinsing each piece of clothing. I then hang my laundry out to dry, this takes several hours on a sunny day, on a cold or cloudy day it could take much longer. Then I fold and put away my clothes. If I start at 8 am then I am usually done by two if I break for lunch. After that I can get on with cleaning my house, walking around my village to speak to the people I need to speak with, buying dinner groceries, and/or playing with kids. The same principal holds true for every task I considered easy or mundane in the states.

    So, while it may seem like I spend all my time travelling, drinking tea, taking showers, and hanging out in my souq town, I do these things as a means to an end. I travel an hour to check the mail, and three hours to my weekly market. So I spend a lot of time on a transit van having strange and interesting conversations and experiences. I drink tea before and after every business meeting or significant social interaction, to not do so would be rude, and frankly it's a social ritual I enjoy. I take actual showers once a week at most, the rest of the time I heat water on my stove in a kettle, stand in a large bucket and use soap and a big green cup to rinse, lather, and repeat. I hang out in my souq town waiting for my tutoring appointments, using the internet (see goal #3), haggling with vegetable and meat merchants, buying odds and ends, waiting for the transit back to site, and socializing with my fellow volunteers. The fact is that I do a lot of things, and spend a lot of time, that doesn't seem productive. I spend most of my time doing things that are not goal #1, and that's how it has to be, but life in the Peace Corps is a lot more complicated than just technical assistance. Life in the Peace Corps is like no other job one can possibly have. It stands alone, and that's why I'm doing it in the first place.

    I posted this because I was confused when I applied, and when I first entered training and again when I arrived in site. I had it completely wrong back home. The Peace Corps was nothing like I first imagined, and it's important to me that the people who read this blog have as clear a picture as possible about what the Peace Corps actually is. I want this to be a dialogue. I welcome your questions and feedback. I want everyone who reads this silly little blog to be as much a part of this as I am. So please, if there is something here that is confusing, doesn't make sense, or provokes any reaction at all, post a response. Find your local returned Peace Corps volunteer and ask them, they're out there I promise. We, all volunteers that I've met anyway, love to talk about our experiences. We have great stories, and we want our friends, families, and communities to understand this part of our lives. Thanks for reading, and thanks for writing. The best is yet to come…

While we’re dreaming…

    It seems like everyone on the mountain is getting care packages these days. While I don't feel any immediate and pressing desire for things that are completely unavailable in country, there are some things, looking forward, that would be very very useful to have. It is in the spirit of un-abashedly jumping on the proverbial band-wagon that I publish this, The Official Wish-List:

1. The largest tub of Peanut Butter available, I mean we're talking multiple-gallon-pump-handle-included here.
   
2. Same thing but with hot sauce. The hot sauce here sucks, it's bitter and hurts my intestines. I think there may be formaldehyde in it, but you know me, I'll probably eat it anyway. Unless I have something else, and Dave's Insanity Sauce would do nicely ;-)
   
3. Boxers… Mine are wearing thin and the stuff available at weekly souq is somewhat more than "gently" used if you get my drift. I would say that I'm a medium these days and continuing to shrink.
   
4. Warm socks, in two months, when this hypothetical package arrives, it'll be fairly cold up here on the roof of North Africa.
   
5. A good 8" chef's knife, the knives available here look like the ginsu infomercial guy would cut them in half to prove how sharp his knives are. This is to say that they are largely useless for any real cooking task; cutting things, for example.
   
6. A high capacity USB with a hardware read-write lock on it. Your best bet would be to ask the guys at Best Buy what that means if it doesn't make sense to you.
   
7. Annie's Mac n cheese various flavors
   
8. Toothbrushes maybe three or four would keep me going for a while
   
9. A French Press coffee maker
   
10. A thermos
    
11. Butterfingers, I don't care what size, I just miss them
    
12. Any type of pork product you think would survive two months in the mail, pepperoni in log form; that sort of thing.
    
13. Dried spices, mainly basil, five spice powder, and gumbo file. A few cans of thai curry paste would be nice too red or green I don't care either way, but my sitemate likes to make green curry.
    
14. Books, good books, any books, picture books. Anything to stave off the boredom that includes words on paper in English.
    

Alright blog readers that's all I can think of for now. Keep in mind that this is a wish list not a need list. I can and will survive just fine without any of this stuff. That said a few people have asked me for my address so they can send stuff and what I would like. I would like to say in advance that I appreciate anything sent and will do my level best to reply in kind with postcards letters and whatnot. Some notes on mailing things to Morocco…DO NOT INSURE ANYTHING!!! They will make me pay a bribe for the amount of the insurance in US dollars, which I don't have access to. If something is in brand new packaging take it out and mark it used. Don't label stuff fragile, just pack it with the assumption that it will not be handled gently. Please don't send me anything that says alcohol, pork, Christian/Christ/Christianity, or has naked/racy pictures on the outside. I have to look the people I will pick this package up from in the eye for the next two years. Basically give no clue on the outside of the package that the contents are any more valuable or interesting than pencil shavings. Thanks again for anything you feel moved to throw into the mail. If you need my address you can feel free to contact me via Facebook or e-mail. I will not post that information on this oh-so-public forum for safety/security reasons. Peace out ya'll and thanks for reading.